The past few weeks, “Call Me By Your Name” has taken my friend group by storm. Practically all my friends have seen it, cried and then begged me to see it too. After all, the film showcases a gay relationship, and I’m a lesbian.

But the problem in this film doesn’t lie in the fact there is a very prominent gay relationship in a movie, but in how the relationship plays out: representation is only good when it doesn’t hurt the community.

The gay and lesbian community has long struggled with harmful stereotypes, such as the “predatory lesbian” and the “gay men prey on young boys” stigma. “Call Me By Your Name” has an age difference that only perpetuates these stereotypes.

Now, technically this relationship is consensual- the younger character is 17 while the older one is 24 in Italy, where the age of consent is 14. But just because the age of consent is so low doesn’t erase the power dynamics behind this film, nor does it make it completely okay.

There’s a reason seniors aren’t interested in dating freshmen; although the age difference is only a few years, the levels of maturity are drastically different. Varying maturity levels don’t stop once you’re an adult, as an 18-year-old and a 25-year-old most likely have far different mindsets.

A 17-year-old is still a child, while a 24-year-old definitely has an advantage in a relationship- it all goes back to power dynamics.

People often use their age to gain superiority over others, and a relationship is no exception. Although this relationship is not pedophilic, it’s hard to deny that the age difference isn’t the best.

If the couple were straight, it would certainly raise more flags for audiences, but subconsciously, society has ingrained in us that gay men are predatory and are only capable of dating younger men.

This rhetoric not only creates more stigma for the gay and lesbian community, but also furthers hate crimes against us.